HH: Heidi Horoscope. No of course it is not my real name.
Yeah -- they will be kind of Horoscopes, not really- more a thinly
veiled call to arms meant for my neighbors, my family and myself, I
HH: My husband would kill me I he found out. (pause) But he won't find out. (pause) And I don't care.
So okay, that is kind of a tough question, but let me try to answer
briefly. Recently, something happened to me that is very common to
happen to people my age. My mother in law died. So, with my husband's
mother dead, my husband had all of that Oedipal shit to work through or
whatever happens to boys when mommy dies- and my father in law moved in
HH: No, I have just the one kid. A girl.
- Right, so, for two days I looked in the mirror. After my mother in
laws death. I'm not even speaking metaphorically. That is what wealth
buys you. Time. And I don't even consider myself rich, but I have to
admit, we do well. Upper middle class or whatever. And we do well in
America so, on a Global scale, our wealth is -- let's admit it, kind of
pornographic. So tonight for example, my friend, she is not even my
friend she is my husband's buddies wife, I don't think I can even call
her my friend- she is coming over for drinks- they are coming over for
drinks. We see them all of the time. But the amount of steel I need to
muster to just be with her is exhausting. She is going to insist on
praying with me- for my mother in law's soul- and I just want to scream-
live your life bitch- LIVE! She's a Jesus freak. You would not believe
how many of them we have in New England. Anyway, when I look at her, and
most of my neighbors, I think of that quote, you know.... Most men live
lives of quiet desperation. I mean, I'm not a man, and I hate cliché,
and I really kind of hate Thoreau, but I just got to a point where my
desperation was not going to be so quite anymore.
Yes, and that is why I am doing these horoscopes that are in no way
actually horoscopes. I know it does not make any sense but it will.
(pause) I think it will.